What to Expect in Divorce Mediation

March 7, 2017

When shopping for a good mediator, here is what you should be looking for. Mediators who settle cases efficiently and fairly do the following:

  1. Key Issues. Help you figure out what the real issues are and focus in on these matters.
  2. Goals. Help you formulate your goals and keep you on track towards reaching these goals.
  3. Fair Process. Ensure that the settlement process is fair for both parties by evening-up the playing field in terms of power and knowledge.
  4. Documents and Information. Assist in formulating a list of necessary documents and information so that you do not get overwhelmed at this emotionally difficult time.
  5. Sorting and Categorizing. Assist in the efficient sorting and categorizing of key facts, laying out the family financial picture, determining which issues are emotional/personal versus matters which can actually be settled in mediation, and determining which battles are worth fighting.
  6. Education. Educating and informing you with regard to relevant legal, financial, tax and child-related matters.
  7. Negotiation Techniques. Use of time-tested negotiation facilitation techniques (e.g. neutralizing language, focus of needs versus strategy, ensure key information is understood, focus on problem solving versus punishment).
  8. Property Settlement Agreement. Provide excellent skills in writing up your Property Settlement Agreement. This is the court-ready document that sets forth your entire divorce settlement agreement. An experienced lawyer-mediator is usually best when it comes to writing up such a document.

By Erin Brockman, Mediation, Research & Marketing Assistant
Robin Graine, JD, CDFA

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FAMlaw Seminar Announcement

April 16, 2014

Robin Graine to Speak at FAMlaw Seminar

May 13, 2014 ~ Fairfax, VA

Virginia State Bar Approved for MCLE Hours

             On Tuesday, May 13, 2014, Robin Graine, JD of Graine Mediation will be speaking, along with a distinguished panel of lawyers and judges, at FAMlaw’s Fairfax Seminar: Practicing Family Law; Avoiding Malpractice”

 To pre-register for this seminar, visit www.famlawseminars.com or call 800-272-5053.

 8:30am – 4:30pm on Tuesday, May 13, 2014 – Fair Oaks Marriott

11787 Lee Jackson Memorial Hwy, Fairfax, VA 22033

$249 registration fee for the first attendee

$189 for 2nd and 3rd registrant from same firm

            Ms. Graine will be giving a talk on the importance of mediation as a settlement option when couples decide to get a divorce. She will also give the nuts and bolts of practicing mediation in Virginia. Specifically, Ms. Graine will cover:

  • What is mediation?
  • What does a typical mediation look like?
  • What needs to be included in an Agreement to Mediate?
  • Do clients have rules to follow in mediation?
  • Do mediators have rules to follow?
  • How do mediators maintain their neutrality?
  • Is mediation confidential?
  • Are mediators allowed to also practice law?
  • What do you do, as a mediator, when clients “lose control”?
  • Is there a difference between court ordered and voluntary mediation?
  • What does the term “mediator as educator” mean?
  • Are there differences between a Mediated Property Settlement Agreement and an attorney drafted Property Settlement Agreement?
  • What is the criteria and training necessary to become a mediator?

Other seminar highlights include:

  • How to avoid QDRO and divorce malpractice lawsuits
  • What does divorce litigation look like from the bench?
  • How to properly use support-based QDROs
  • Expert Analysis of Virginia Code §20-107.3 (equitable distribution of property & debt)
  • Strategies for tough child custody & spousal support cases

Other speakers include:

Raymond S. Dietrich, JD

– Founder of QDRO Trak

– Author of Qualified Domestic Relations Orders: Strategy and Liability for the Family Law Attorney (Matthew Bender 2013 ©)

Principal attorney in the Galleon Network – a national network of licensed attorneys specializing in the drafting and litigation of QDROs and COAPs for lawyers and clients

Honorable Lorraine Nordlund, 19th Judicial Circuit of Virginia (Fairfax)

– Serving Fairfax County as a judge since 1996; sworn in Circuit Court on February 1, 2010

– Reputation in the legal community for thoughtful and fair decision-making

David L. Duff, JD

– Founding, principal attorney at The Duff Law Firm (Fairfax, VA)

– Practicing law since 1976

– Divorce attorney as well as personal injury, auto accidents, and legal malpractice

John C. Whitbeck, Jr., JD

– Founder of Whitbeck Cisneros McElroy, P.C.

– Practice focuses on family law, education law, criminal law, mental health law and civil litigation

– Former professor of law at George Mason University Law School

– Former director of George Mason Mental Illness Clinic

Alanna C.E. Williams, JD (Duff Law Firm)

– Reputation in the community as a tenacious advocate for divorce clients as well as an effective negotiator

– Joined The Duff Law Firm in 2004; made a Principal of the firm in February 2009

Wesley P. Gelb, JD

– Partner at Ain & Bank, Washington, DC

– Practice focuses on family law and general litigation

– Broad experience litigating family matters in Washington, D.C., Virginia and Maryland


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